I went out for dinner with some co-workers last night. Now, I'm not the most sociable person on the planet, city, block, faculty … Let's just say that I don't present myself well in groups where I don't know the other people very well and it wouldn't surprise me at all if the term "socially awkward" has passed the lips of multiple colleagues when describing me to others … Anyway, I've come to realize that, being a tad socially awkward tends to make one into Bubble Boy–I'm totally not plugged into the good gossip and I don't have even the vaguest sense of what colleagues' opinions about one another might be.
In a lot of ways, being Bubble Boy is kind of a good thing (though being socially awkward … not so much). Every once in a while, though, it is MOST FASCINATING to venture out of my bubble and find out what the world outside is thinking.
It's nice to know, for example, that other people keep a mental list of co-workers that they'd vote off the island in a heartbeat if given the chance because it doesn't make me feel as bad about mine (though, from the conversation I suspect that I might be the only one who keeps an actual physical list … ha, ha, ha … just kidding … sort of …). It's also distressing, though, to think that you might be on someone else's top four (actually, I'm sure that I'm probably in the top two of at least one person's list, but he's a total bag of intestinal gas so being on his list is something I can live with …). At work, I try to pretend that I'm a nice person, but you know it is REALLY HARD to fake that kind of thing for as long as I've been working at the place.
Anyway, the upshot is that it was fun and I'm a Bubble Boy …