My friends, S. who posts Eating With Chan and Scooter Kitty, have both got me thinking about food. I'm not so much into the the whole food movement (As opposed to Whole Foods … aka. Whole Paycheck). I know that I SHOULD be into eating clean whole organic food, but I LOVE processed foods so that's probably not going to happen whole hog anytime soon … The cafeteria's serving preserved meat today? Count me in!!! Yay!!!
So … that got me thinking. What are my favorite processed foods? Hmmmmmm. That's really a tough one …
I will number my list, as a numbered list indicates that there is a hierarchy to the items that I have included. This is what I taught some of my young charges in my course's last unit. But I digress … Here's the list:
- Hamburgers – I am a big proponent of chopped meat. Give me a choice between a good ole' steak and a hamburger, and I'll choose a hamburger just about every time. I could almost say every time, except that if you ever go to Ruth's Chris Steak House, you'll understand why every once in a while a good fillet will trump the hamburger. Everywhere else, though … "Hamburger, please."
- Sausage of any kind – Chicken and apple, pork, turkey, beef, Portuguese, linguisa, chorizo, Italian … It's all good!!!
- Spam – Yay for Spam!!! Beware, however, of places that say they serve "Spam" then try to do a bait and switch and serve you Treat or Prem. That is just wrong, wrong, wrong!!!
- Diet Pepsi – I am addicted to Caffeine Free Diet Pepsi. I will probably die of some horrible disease because of it, but I know that I will not be a fat ass due to my soda habit.
- Ketchup – The Reagan Administration tried its best to wreck this food as a processed food by declaring it a "vegetable," but we all know that this is a great product. Keep in mind, however, that the only kind of ketchup worth eating has high fructose corn syrup as one of its main ingredients. In reality, ketchup should probably be placed at #1, but I didn't think of it early enough and it is just too much work to move all these pictures so it will have to be satisfied at #5.
- Frozen Chicken Pot Pies – Pop them in the micro, nuke for 5 minutes and you get hot pie with a flaky browned crust. WTF??? How does it get brown? I suppose that there is some kind of science behind it, but I like to think of it as magic.
- French Fries – Crinkle cut or steak fries only. People like those In n' Out fries that are just potatoes cut into long strips and fried, but to my mind they're just a bit too natural to be right.
- Twinkies – When I taught littlies, we studied the concept of decomposition. We would put food in baggies and pin them onto a bulletin board in an outdoor hallway in September and observe them as they decomposed over time. One year a kid choose to put up a Twinkie and in June it looked good enough to eat!!! Now, one HAS to admire a food that has that much perseverance! The only other food had lasting power anywhere NEARLY as good as the Twinkie was the chicken patty with gravy from a school lunch. I have to admit, it did give me pause when even my second graders remarked, "Eeewwww, what are those things made of????" But still, my love for them lives on.
- Pringles – The orderliness and consistency of having each and every single one the same size and shape really appeals to people who work in big buildings with lots of books of which I am one.
- Duplex Creme Cookies – $1.09 for a lb of cookies from Target. That says it all.